Differentiation of self

undifferentiated family ego mass

Clarity about who you are (as a person separate from others)

Clarity about distinction of thoughts and feelings

Emotional reactivity (explosiveness)

When feelings take control of thought

Fusion of thought and feelings
Fusion of self with others

Feelings influence thoughts which influence feelings (e.g. depression)

Feelings of others in the group inescapably trigger similar feelings in self

Triangulation

Diffusing anxiety in a relationship by pulling in a third party

Pseudo-self

Co-dependent, compliant placator

Emotional cutoff

Overwhelmed by a relationship, one escapes by fleeing to a fake autonomy

Repeating multi-generational dysfunctional patterns

Need to unlearn dysfunctional coping habits by exposing the patterns (thru use of genogram) so that the person has a choice. (Normalizing the patterns reduces their shame.)

Dysfunctional reciprocal relationship

• overadequate/inadequate
• decisive/indecisive
• dominant/submissive
• marital conflict or emotional cutoff

Same level of differentiation, but played out in complementary form